Being an entrepreneur has its ups and downs
Since my career change from being a lawyer to a massage therapist/energy healer in July, my life has been dramatically different. There have been so many ups and downs and I'm beginning to understand and have empathy more for parents and my friends who say "I just don't have enough time to be able to do my housework or cook".
When I was a lawyer, I seriously could not understand how my friends couldn't organise their time effectively. I prided myself on being a very efficient person - I pretty much had a schedule that factored into account housework, cooking ,etc! However, moving into the unknown territory of being an entrepreneur, I wasn't exactly ready to be smacked in the face with a lot of lessons.
For those who read this blog occasionally, you probably already know that I have learnt the lesson of being in the moment, or rather, being OK with not knowing what my days are going to be like from a work perspective. I have also learnt the lesson of being grateful for what I have (although sometimes I get stuck in the duality - grateful for it but wishing I had more time, etc instead). However, the biggest lesson was this - things aren't what you expect them to be.
As an entrepreneur, I've realised that I have to do everything. I'm the CEO in terms of building my own business and making sure I'm at least making enough money to live and have some fun. I'm the "man" power in terms of the massage therapist and the energy healer. I am the marketer in terms of coming up with content for social media - specifically Instagram - where I am trying to come up with daily posts in the hopes of giving people some extra information they might find useful in their lives. I'm also the chief financial officer - issuing invoices, reconciling my accounts, making sense of BAS statements and chasing up my tax returns. I'm the operations manager and admin manager in trying to ensure that appointments and reminder emails are sent, my clinic room is adequately stocked with what I need for the day, making sure my towels are cleaned etc. I'm the IT officer in terms of fixing things on my own website and making sure that it runs properly.
On top of that, I am responsible for the upkeep of my apartment and keeping myself healthy, I am a friend who tries to catch up with her friends now and again, I'm a daughter who rarely has time to see or talk to her parents, I'm a cousin who has no time to see her relatives, and I'm a girlfriend who struggles at times to find enough time to be with her boyfriend. I'm also a student studying two diplomas and then dabbling in other modalities that I'm guided to do in the meantime. I am also a student of the spiritual world - trying to make myself better and keep my spiritual practice going every single day.
It's tough - it's bloody tough. Sometimes, on days like today, I sit back and think "Man is it really worth it?". Sometimes I just want to sit down and cry. The whole concept of being out of control to this extent really baffles me and it's difficult to get my head around. The perfectionist in me wants everything to be done. My body on the other hand is telling me that I need rest and that I can stuff the need to get everything done so that I don't have to think about it tomorrow.
*sighs* I know this is just a passing phase and things will get better. This post is a way for me just to get the helpless feeling I have out of my system. I know that everything happens for a reason - just not too sure of the reason yet. Only about 4 weeks to go until I get a week off so that would be good! In the meantime, I need to continue to count my blessings in terms of the clients I'm getting and just know that the Universe doesn't throw at me things that I can't handle.
When I was a lawyer, I seriously could not understand how my friends couldn't organise their time effectively. I prided myself on being a very efficient person - I pretty much had a schedule that factored into account housework, cooking ,etc! However, moving into the unknown territory of being an entrepreneur, I wasn't exactly ready to be smacked in the face with a lot of lessons.
For those who read this blog occasionally, you probably already know that I have learnt the lesson of being in the moment, or rather, being OK with not knowing what my days are going to be like from a work perspective. I have also learnt the lesson of being grateful for what I have (although sometimes I get stuck in the duality - grateful for it but wishing I had more time, etc instead). However, the biggest lesson was this - things aren't what you expect them to be.
As an entrepreneur, I've realised that I have to do everything. I'm the CEO in terms of building my own business and making sure I'm at least making enough money to live and have some fun. I'm the "man" power in terms of the massage therapist and the energy healer. I am the marketer in terms of coming up with content for social media - specifically Instagram - where I am trying to come up with daily posts in the hopes of giving people some extra information they might find useful in their lives. I'm also the chief financial officer - issuing invoices, reconciling my accounts, making sense of BAS statements and chasing up my tax returns. I'm the operations manager and admin manager in trying to ensure that appointments and reminder emails are sent, my clinic room is adequately stocked with what I need for the day, making sure my towels are cleaned etc. I'm the IT officer in terms of fixing things on my own website and making sure that it runs properly.
On top of that, I am responsible for the upkeep of my apartment and keeping myself healthy, I am a friend who tries to catch up with her friends now and again, I'm a daughter who rarely has time to see or talk to her parents, I'm a cousin who has no time to see her relatives, and I'm a girlfriend who struggles at times to find enough time to be with her boyfriend. I'm also a student studying two diplomas and then dabbling in other modalities that I'm guided to do in the meantime. I am also a student of the spiritual world - trying to make myself better and keep my spiritual practice going every single day.
It's tough - it's bloody tough. Sometimes, on days like today, I sit back and think "Man is it really worth it?". Sometimes I just want to sit down and cry. The whole concept of being out of control to this extent really baffles me and it's difficult to get my head around. The perfectionist in me wants everything to be done. My body on the other hand is telling me that I need rest and that I can stuff the need to get everything done so that I don't have to think about it tomorrow.
*sighs* I know this is just a passing phase and things will get better. This post is a way for me just to get the helpless feeling I have out of my system. I know that everything happens for a reason - just not too sure of the reason yet. Only about 4 weeks to go until I get a week off so that would be good! In the meantime, I need to continue to count my blessings in terms of the clients I'm getting and just know that the Universe doesn't throw at me things that I can't handle.